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Dogs were doing sx Boy- papa ye kya hai? Papa- ek kutta dusre ka sahara le k chal raha hai Boy- ajib kalyug hai..jisko sahara do wahi Ga#d marta hai. |
Madam- beta agar mai sakht hun to bahut sakht hun aur agar naram hun to
bahut naram Bachcha- arey madam aap to bilkul meri 'LULLU' ki tarah ho. |
70 yr old man: Doc meri age mein SX style kya hona chahiye? Doc: Doggy style. Man: Aapka matlab peeche se…? Doc: Nahin, sirf suungh aur chaat k. |
Sardar ko chirag mila, ragda to jinn nikla.- Kya hukum hai mere aaka? Sardar: mera Lu#d road touch kare aisa kuchh kardo. - Jinn ne sardar ki dono tange kat di. | ||||
Dad gajab ho gaya, bhai darwaja nahi! khol raha. Dad: kal to uski suhagraat thi. Son: Kal raat ko bhai ne cold cream mangi thi maine FEVICOL de diya bhul se. |
Santa: My 8yr old son is very naughty, he has made my maid servant
pregnant. Confused Banta: How the hell? Santa: He took a pin & punctured all my condoms. |
A Sardar was urinating beside a car. A Foreigner said to him " AAP K YAHAN POLICE NAHIN PAKADHTI ?" He replied,"NAHIN HAMAARE YAHAN KHUD PAKADHNA PADHTA HAI !" |
Ek Bar ek shaitan uperwale se bola mujhe sab se khubsurat bana taki mai sunder ladkiyon ka khoon pee saku, uperwala haskar bola ja tujhe ''WHISPAR" bana diya. | ||||
Which woman has the biggest vag!na in the world? Sunni Deol’s mother, b’coz Sunni himself said: “MAI NIKLA GADDI LEKE” |
Lady: Doctor bachcha wahin se nikalta hai na jahan Lu#d daalte hai? Doctor: Yes. Lady: Iska matlab mera bachcha mere muh se niklega !! |
Beti- Maa baju wale ko dekhate hi mera bra tite ho jata hai. Maa- Beti bra mat pahna kar fir dekh uska Underwear Tite ho jayega. |
In a party, a lady wanted to go to toilet. She said to Santa: Susu karne
ki jagah dikhaao. Santa: U naughty girl, pehle tum dikhaao. |
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Husband: "Plz aaj karne do mai tumhare liye kapde la dunga. Wife: No...!! Husband: Jewar la dunga, Wife: No..!!!!! Beta bola: " Papa aap meri Ga#d maar lo par naya CYCLE dila do." |
Teacher: kya cheez muh mein nahin leni chahiye. Student: jalta hua bulb, Teacher: why? Student: kal raat ko mummy papa se keh rahi thi "bulb bujha do to muh me loongi" |
Pati- "aao SX kare " Patni- "pehle Condom to lagao" Pati- "Condom to pata nahi maine kaha rakh diya" Patni- "ye roz ki bakarcho#i se to achcha hai ki Lamination karwa lo" |
Ek lady k 6 judwa bachche hue, to wo gusse se apne Husband k paas aati
hai, aur use zor se ek thappad mar k kehti hai..... "Mai tumko kahti thi naa Doggy Style me mat kiya karo.....!!" |
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Doctor: Aapke ghutne me moch kaise aai, Lady: I was f~cked in doggy style. Doctor: Don't u know any other styles? Lady: I know, but my dog doesn't….!!! |
The wife was crying in pain as Banta was tryin to f~ck her in the ass. Banta says: Zyada rone ki zaroorat nahin, mujhe pata hai kitna dard hota hai |
Rocket & Plane Plane says: "yaar Rocket tum itni tez raftaar se kaise udh jate ho?" Rocket: "yeh to wohi jaane jis k ga#d main AAG lagi ho...." |
Santa and banta were caught raping a girl. They were called for identification parade. When the girl arrives, both Santa and Banta shout together: Yahi thee, Yahi thee" | ||||
Jeeto: Oh zara dheere karo, kyon Shatabdi chala rahe ho, Maalgadi
chalaao. Itne mein Pappu bed se gira aur bola jo marzi chalaao par sawaari ko to mat giraao |
Santa: Main ghar jaate hi biwi ki panty utar dunga. Banta: Yaar tu to bahut mood mein lag raha hai. Santa: Nahi yaar mujhe bahut tight ho rahi hai. |
Ek Kauwa(crow) Sardar k upar Shit(tatti) kar deta hai to Sardarni tissue
paper lakar deti hai, Sardar kehta hai : "Ab kiski ga#d ponchhu? Kauwa to udd gaya.....!" |
Sardar G to his friend: "yaar badi mushkil mein hoon, meri BV mujhse ek
kiss ka 100 Rs. leti hai" Friend: "Achcha, yaar tu to bada hi Lucky hai, dusron se to wo 500 Rs. leti hai". |
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Gabbar: Basanti tatti kar. Viru: nahi Basanti in kutto ke samne tatti mat karna ye log tujhe paani nahi denge aur mujhse teri Ga#d chatwaaenge! !! |
Wife:"Dr. mere pati k Lu#d pe madhumukkhi ne kata hai" Dr.: "oh!, suujh gaya, Dard bhi hai kaya?" Wife:" Ji han, lekin sirf dard ki Dawa do, suujan rahne do. ! |
Pandit fati dhoti pehan k Mandir mein maatha tekne jhuka to ek aurat ne
Daan Peti samajh k Sikka dal diya. Pandit mudkar bola ab ghanta bhi baja lo. |
Ek baar ek kabutar ne Sardar pe bit kar di.. Sardar-'madarc#:d teri maa ne chaddi pehnna nahi sikhaya kya? Kabutar-'bhenc#:d to tu kya chaddi me karta hai.' |
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Swami: hamesha apne se bade ko Maa, chhoti ko Beti aur barabar wali ko
Bahan mano. Sardar: BaBa aisa karo ye Lu#d aap rakh lo, JadiButi kutne ke kaam aayega. |
College me ek ladki k jeans ki zip khuli thi, toh ek ladka jaakar bola, "miss, apke tajmahal ka darwaza band kijiye, Yahan hamare qutub-minar hil rahe hai". |
Lady: Bus mein cigarette pina mana hai, board nahi pada kya? Man: sali uske baju ka board pad lika hai " CONDOM ISTEMAL KARIYE" to kya Bus mein karu. |
Pair dabate hue saas ka ghaghra sarak gaya, Bahu ne PRANAM kiya. Saas
boli: Are ye kya kar rahi hai? Bahu boli: Are Sasu G yahi to hai mere Pati ki Janm bhumi aur Sasur ki Karm bhumi. |
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Santa's urine report got exchanged with a ladies pregnancy report. Dr. told santa, "you are pregnant". Angry santa shouts at wife, "Maine pehle hi kaha tha, mujhe upar rehne de". |
Teacher- teri shikayat aayi k tu gaali bakta hai. Student- sir, maine to kabhi kisi behnch~d ko gali nahi di pata nahi kis m#d#rch~d ne aapki Ga#d me ungli ki hai. |
santa and banta lost in a jungle.after 2 days of struggle for food and water santa asked to banta.yaar meri ga#d maar le.bunta why?santa Replied: "yaar kuch to ander jayega" |
Ek bus mein ladko aur ladkiyo ki team antakshari khelne k liye bani- Girls: Hum tumko haraakar dikhayenge..... Boys: Hum haar gaye, chalo ab dikhao. |
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