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Santa: Mein tumhare liye churiyan laya hoon. Maid: Aap hi pehna dijiye. Santa: Mujhe tumhara response pehle pata hota to mein panty lekar aata |
Shahjada salim: "humare amma abba humse itna Pyar karte the ki humare sone
tak humare pass baithe rahte aur hum phir bhi na sote" Wazir: "isliye to janab aap eklaute rah gaye" |
Lalu- aaj kuch naya kare, Rabri- ka? Lalu- aaj hum tohre kaan me dalunga ! Rabri- na baba na baheri ho gai to? Lalu- dhatt pagli muh me li to gungi hui ka. |
Boy call girl ko upar bitha kar sx kar raha tha- Boy- din me kitna kama leti ho? call girl- 500/- Boy- sach batao? call girl- rozi pe baithi hun jhuth nahi bolungi. |
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Girls Hostel warden calla Electric office & Complains: "aaj to aadmi bhejj do Ladkiyan 3 din se Mombatti se kaam chala rahi hai.!!" |
Harbhajan to his wife: Darling ! kya main tera pahila pyar hoo ? Wife: Kardina sardar wali baat. Spinner ko kabhi opening milti hai kya? |
man throws wife's bra out of the window at it falls on a mango seller.. he says: saale ne aam choos lia, aur chhilka mere uper phek diye. | 10dular was having sx with malika she said tumhari nuni pe to aids likha hai, 10dulkar said are khada to hone de,.. uspe ADIDAS likha hai. | ||
Pappu sees his parents having SX. Pappu: Papa, kya kar rahe ho? Santa: Petrol bhar raha hoon. Pappu: Avg check karaao, abhi to Banta uncle dal kar gaye hain. |
After first Night Abhisek to Aish: "aaj mujhe koi aisi baat batao jisse
mujhe bahut khushi bhi mile aur bahut gussa bhi aaye" Aish: "Tumhara lu#d sallu or vivek se bada aur hard hai". |
Santa: Yaar meri biwi pani se bahut darti hai. Banta: Achaa, wo kaise? Santa: Kal mein jab ghar gaya to wo bath tub mai bhi security guard k saath baithi thi |
6 yrs boy k rape case me pakda jane par: Court me Lowyer(Boy ka Lu#d pakde hue): "ur honour is chhote se bachche ko dekho kya ye rape kar sakta hai?" Boy to lawyer: "Itna na hila, nahin to case haar jayenge!!" |
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Thought of the Day: Nari-Nari mat kar, Nari narak ka Dwar, khush bhi hogi to kya degi wahi mal mutr ka Dwar. |
Nan: Dr. mere urine report me kya hai. Dr.: u r Pregnant. Nan: o my god ! ab to Candle ka bhi bharosa nahi !!!!! |
srdr-"Darling nind nahi aa rahi,kuch SX hojaye" wife-"befkuf meri ch#t me kya nind ki goliya bhari hai jo tujhe nind aa jayegi".. |
Santa travelling in Virgin Atlantic asked 4 milk. Air hostess put her
nipple in his mouth. Santa: Achha hua paani nahi manga. |
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Santa was fondling a lady in a crowded bus. Lady: Excuse me, aap achha nahi kar rahe hain! Santa: Itni bheed me is se achha nahi ho sakta. |
Ladki k T-Shirt par bani Billi ko dekhkar Ladka ghurne laga. Ladki Boli- Kabhi Billi nahi dekhi kya? Ladka- billi to bahut dekhi par Dudh ki rakhwali karte nahi. |
garibi se tang pati bola- lgta hai ab dosto k aage hath failane padenge. ye sun ke biwi boli- jaldi se aap hath faila lo, warna mujhe tange failani padengi. |
ek sardar ne biwi ko surprise dene k liye apni dadhi baal katwa li aur chupke se so gaya, neend me jab biwi ne muh pe hath fera to boli are gupta g ! aap kab aaye? | ||
Papa- Beta tumhe kaisi Biwi chahiye? Beta- chand jaisi Biwi, jo raat me aaye aur subah chali jaye... Papa- Beta use chand nahi Raand kahte hai. |
Santa ko susu karta dekh ladki rasta badal kar jaane lagi to Santa bola: O madam, ghabrao mat, tum jisse dar rahi ho usko maine pakad kar rakha hai...! |
santa- mujhse panga na le mai sher da puttar hu..!! Banta- yaar santa ek baat to bata... sher ghar aaya tha ki aunty jungle gai thi. |
Blood test ke baad nurse ne Sardarji ki Ungli choosi .Sardarji muskuraye, Nurse ne poocha kya hua? Sardarji bole- Is ke baad Urine test Hai | ||
Ek baar ek nanga admi aur ek hathi amane samne khade the hathi ne nange admi ko kuch der dekha aur puchha "yaar tum is chhoti c sund se kaise saans lete ho". |
Ladki- bhaiya 12 kele dedo, fruit wala- ye lo, Ladki- ye to naram hai thode kadak do, fruit wala- kya madam kabhi to khane k liye liya karo..!!! |
Lady teacher:- bolo I for inkpot, J for Jug, K for kite, L for L~nd oops sorry muh se nikal gaya... Boy:- madam sorry ki kya baat hai wapas muh me le lijiye na. |
Santa: Bhai Saab ek condom dena. Meine girlfriend ko gift dena hai. Dukandar: Is par cover chada du. Santa: arre nai yeh to cover hai gift to mere pass hai. |
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12 Sardar r raping a woman ..the woman is laughing nonstop ..so after
the sardars get bugged n ask her: "why r u laughing" She replies: "mujhe AIDS hai" |
A lady to another lady: Jab tera divorce hua tha tab to ek hi bachcha tha
aur ab 3 kaise? She says: Wo kabhi kabhi maafi mangne aa jate the... |
Sardar- "bed majbut banana mere bete ko bahu k sath sona hai" mistri- "aisa majbut bed banaunga sara mohalla bahu k sath soega to bhi nahi tutega." |
Mom to Kid: "jo bachhe angutha chuste hain unka pet fool jata hai" Ek din bachhe ne ek pregnant aunty ko dekha aur bola: "mujhe pata hai aapne kya chusa hai". |
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1 ladki apna wazan taul rahi thi- 58 kg, sandal utari-56kg, jacket utari-53kg, dupatta utari-52kg, sikke khatam... tabhi ek bikhari bola- "tu kaam chalu rakh sikke mai deta hu." |
Sardar ki biwi mar gai, dost ne pucha kaise mar gai. Sardar: yar muh me muh tha, ch~t me l~nd tha, ga#d me ungali thi aatma pata nahi kaha se gai. |
Lady: BaBa mera pati kab sudhrega? BaBa: pati ko laye ho? Lady: nahi. BaBa: koi baat nahi apna blouse kholiye, Lady: kyu? BaBa: pati ki hath ki rekha dekhni hai. |
Sardar 2 shopkeeper:"mere size ka condom milega?" Shopkeeper:"tum itne
bare condom ka kya karoge?" Sardar: fancy dress show me lu#d ban k jaunga |
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